Ninja-bankers and day traders:
It has come to my attention that one of you has learned of the mighty robotninja ‘Way of the electromagnetic synthesizer’, and has begun to use it for the ridiculous (yet appropriate) purpose of playing the imperial march from your Star Wars films. Foolish manbags! You have yet to master the intricacies of electrovoltaic performance, much less develop any kind of meaningful spectral dynamics in your playing. May the robot-ogres of Shamwow9 devour your bones!
Robotninja is the tensor
Ninjabots
I laugh the laugh of kings when I think about the limitless spectra of my robotninja mind compared to your limited earthbound awareness. Nonetheless, this presentation of the totality of your technical and biological perspective pleases me.
Robotninja: multi-spectrum for the rectum
You must prepare yourselves for what’s coming, my ninjas.
Mankind will forever remain a mystery to me: the denizens of Japan have put into production 1/100 scale model replicas of the fearsome robo-beast, MechaGodzilla, in an obvious attempt to anger the MechaGodz themselves, bringing its wrath unto all enemies. For $800 you too can own a miniature abomination, a suitable idol for robot demons.
We robotninja both fear and worship the giant robot space-lizard, who is capable of so many things we can only dream of. As we all know, MechaGodzilla is made from indestructible space titanium alloy and is equipped with a powerful laser that fires from the mouth of a head that can rotate 360 degrees. The robot’s fingers and toes are actually deadly missiles, and hidden within the beast’s chest is, of course, the fearsome Maser weapon.
It’s only a matter of time before those Japanese start building 100/100 scale replicas.
ninja-lasers are the only defense.
An interesting juxtaposition, my ninjas.
Below are two images, each representing a distinct and unfathomable aspect of our reality: one is the theoretical universe as described by astrophysicists, the other is a neuron and its surrounding cells.
The R0b0tninja have known of these and many other parallels between thought process and the physical universe, such that would shatter your fragile human souls to know. Nonetheless, we too are astounded by the implications that these parallels present, (beyond their obvious applications in ninja-teleportation techniques), the nature of which remains a mystery even to us.
Dream of life or realize death?
My ninjas and non-ninja bretheren,
The US department of Energy at Oak Ridge has released this photo of its new, 284 unit supercomputer, stepping humanity’s computational powers up to my r0b0tninja standards.
Naturally, we r0b0tninja have been calcuating quadrillions of calculations per second a MILLION times a second, so you can only imagine the depths of our bemusement when we found out about this latest fledgling development.
You have now stepped over and into the void, mankind: what would once take the combined efforts of every man, woman and child on the planet 650 years to complete, a computer can now do in one single day…
Behold the pale Jaguar!
Friends, robots, country-ninjas
For too long the realm of time traveling robots has been left to your Terminators, your Futuramas and occasionally your Time-cops. Now, in the year of our robot-lord, 2008, you too can experience the various paradoxes (paradoxi?) that robots and robotninjas alike have to face in our day-to-day lives/functions, thanks to the efforts of the good people over at Kongregate games.
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I personally use my time-travelling duplicates to intern around the robotninja office. Though sometimes our ego’s clash, we respect one another enough to get work done. Whenever problems arise, however, I am quick to dole out severe, crippling punishment to myselves, my superior orignal mind/body pit against itself in a feat of dualistic spectacle. Fighting against and defeating myself isn’t ever easy, but if anyone can do it, it’s me.
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And that’s where this game Chronotron can’t handle the reality of time-traveling ninjabots–in real life, I can simply slaughter any time-paradox creating ninja-droids at my leisure. In this simplified version of a multi-dimensional, quantum-state fluctuating robot’s life, one is bound by the actions/inactions of your past selves. This disgusts my robotninja sensibilities, but then again, so does nearly all of the works of man and beast. I therefore advise that you take my opinion of this single shortcoming of what is otherwise a fun and clever puzzle-game with a grain of the finest sand. Any of my other opinions taken so lightly, however, will result in the instantaneous and total annihilation of your dojo/laboratory.
ninja Robot, concern no is Time
The Japanese, the people who bought you ninjas and sushi, have pioneered amateur and professional robot battling long after Americans became tired of theirs. I have to say: no number of buzz-saws and claw hammers can beat the humanoid mechs that these japanese robot-masters do battle with.
Balloon-head niggas knockin robots out the box (peace to Ghostface)R0b0tninja
